Changing Behaviour

Its quite difficult to change behaviour. I suppose there are many reasons. Comfort, physical dependency, fear of change, inadequate goals.

There are things about me that I want to change. I wonder sometimes however if the emotional changes I want to make will be truly beneficial. The way I relate to people is not necessarily bad but in certain circumstances has results that were and are undesirable. Do I change the way I approach people from now on?

I suppose, that if in many circumstances, I behave a certain way and get the same certain result and, if I'm unhappy with that result, then perhaps a new method needs to be developed. The problem with the any method is that its untried and unproven and may not result in a better outcome.

My experiences in 2005 and 2006 have made me more weary of jumping in without testing the waters. Both feet on the gas wearing a blindfold is not a good way to get to a destination. Patience and caution have never been virtues of mine but may need to become so. Less can be more and silence can be deafening. Perhaps the way up is down. Who can tell?

To start a journey without a destination means that we will never get there. Yet I know in the past I've started many such journeys knowing where it would lead but hoping that it somehow would be different. Knowing ahead of time that it will end badly, is it still worth getting in the car? No one of us truly knows how things will end and perhaps it is heaven that awaits.

Energy, excitement and enthusiasm have always been my strengths and I doubt I will lose those but perhaps new qualities will compliment the old very well.

You can't lose something you never had so why worry.

I doubt I could have been more cryptic with this post but too many people who know me read this blog. Those who need to understand this already do and for the rest of you I hope I didn't babble too long, I will get back to my usual rants later. I just wanted to post something personal. I'm just in that kind of mood today.

LOL...